I heard the haunting lyrics of this song by Lana Del Rey recently on the radio:
Will you still love me
When I’m no longer young and beautiful?
Will you still love me
When I got nothing but my aching soul?
I know you will, I know you will
I know that you will
Will you still love me when I’m no longer beautiful?
It got me thinking about how society perceives beauty and ageing and how women in particular put so much pressure on themselves to look young. Some even go to the extent of having cosmetic procedures and plastic surgery to take the years away. So what I really liked was this quote from 70 year old Lauren Hutton, thanks to www.growingbolder.com :
I applaud her strong stance on beauty standards as I think she looks terrific for 70 years of age and if I look that good at that age then I will be extremely happy. Yep, she has lines and wrinkles but I can see an inner spark of beauty in this photo and to me that is more important than what’s on the outside.
We have all heard this quote by Dorothy Parker “Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone.” What does this mean? It means that a pleasing appearance is not a guide to character.
Poet & Writer – Dorothy Parker
I believe beauty is the other way around. In my opinion what is on the inside of a person is what is most beautiful about them. Internal beauty through my eyes is, one’s strength of character, integrity, honesty and kindness. Besides external beauty is not eternal, but if combined with internal beauty the impact will last forever. Without achieving internal beauty, external beauty is meaningless.
I have made the acquaintance of many attractive women who after getting to know them, I would say are ugly on the inside. You know those vindictive malicious women who once your back is turned bitch and criticize everything about you? As I have got older and wiser I tend to give these types of women a wide berth. My mantra is to surround myself with positive uplifting people who are genuinely happy for me when I’m happy.
It doesn’t mean that I will give up on my appearance as I will still make an effort to make myself look attractive by keeping fit and healthy, wearing nice clothing, makeup and getting my hair styled. I’m certainly not going to throw in the towel on any of these things yet!
So the answer to my question “Will you still love me when I’m no longer young and beautiful”? Is a resonating yes, I believe people will love me as I am “beautiful on both the inside and outside”, so my Yoga Teacher keeps telling me!
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Pinky Poinker
October 1, 2014What’s really annoying are those stunning women who are beautiful on the inside as well! That’s just unfair! I like Roald Dahl’s take on aging where he says a mean person will begin to look ugly in their old age whereas a kind person’s face will grow softer and sweeter. That is paraphrased but basically what he meant. It’s true though. If you spend your life frowning and scowling you’ll get uglier wrinkles than if you spend life smiling :)
Kathy
October 1, 2014Well that would be karma! I know a few women who I hope will look ugly in their old age, because that’s what they deserve. Lol. I believe you are right as my mum is 83 and she has a soft sweet face because that is what she is on the inside.
Johanna
October 1, 2014I agree Kathy. There’s too much focus on trying to stay and look young. We should be grateful for being allowed to get old, many don’t, but I think, as you say, it’s important to look after ourselves as we age, by keeping as fit as we can, eating healthily, looking our best (soemtimes comfy womfy!) and enjoying the occasional glass of wine (or two).
Kathy
October 1, 2014There is way too much focus on women trying to retain their youthful looks as evidenced on TV and in movies. Almost every celebrity woman I know has had some work done and I think that it is a shame. Why can’t we all just age graciously?
prettymom
October 4, 2014My husband says yes, and that’s all it matters :)
Kathy
October 4, 2014You have a very good husband there. Tell him he is a keeper! Thank you for visiting my blog :)
kacedo34
October 4, 2014Yes! Inner beauty trumps outer beauty every time. I mean, what really is outer beauty? In come cultures it’s different than others. It’s all what society has made it to be. And so is aging :)
Kathy
October 4, 2014Kim you could not have said it any better. There needs to be more people like us that think of ageing as a badge of honour rather than believing that we are losing our looks. :)