As a rule it is mainly young people that create bucket lists and dreams. It is normally not something that older people like myself think about. We generally become complacent and settle for a simple life after we reach a certain age.
However, occasionally life throws you a curve ball and changes your perspective, so you find yourself alone and seeking adventure. I must admit that my adventurous spirit although dwindled, is still very much intact.
Who would ever have thought that I would be in my mid sixties and find myself suddenly single? I certainly never saw it coming.
So after my “Eat, Pray, Love” moment I came to the conclusion that it was time to put my big girl pants on and make some future plans. It was time to get some excitement back into my life and start to tick some things off my newly created bucket list.
A lot of my friends have been telling me you will find love again and there were some cheeky enough to say “you need a man”. My answer to this was “not likely”. I had only just freed myself from entanglement and discontent with a man, why would I want to rush into a relationship again?
For many women, love on the rebound is the answer to curing their loneliness. However, I feel more and more women are finding that this is not what they want anymore. There is much more to life than getting yourself entangled with another man. I personally feel that travel and enjoying new adventures are the answer.
My first solo trip years ago was to Japan on a media trip. I was definitely out of my comfort zone, but after a few days felt completely at ease. Then I ventured to Bali twice on a women’s only group tour to experience the other side to Bali. This was once again a fantastic experience.
Late in 2023 I travelled to Vietnam for ten days of solitude and rejuvenation, including a few days in the hectic HCM City, followed by eights days of bliss in a 5-star resort in Hoi An. There was a lot of interest in a sixty-something year old woman travelling alone. People continually asked me “where is your husband?”
Early in 2024 I embarked on a week long cruise with a girlfriend aboard the Queen Elizabeth from Sydney to Tasmania and Melbourne. This reinforced in me my desire to book more experiences and make some future travel plans.
I found my mind was all over the place and full of wanderlust for places that I was aching to see. A friend inspired me to book a hiking trip in the Flinders Ranges, only to cancel it several months later because I really wanted to travel to South Africa on a guided tour. I had to slow down and work out a future travel plan, because I was wandering aimlessly not really making sensible decisions.
My ex husband and I had paid a deposit on two European cruises with a group of friends, so I then decided that I should still take this holiday solo because it was a fabulous opportunity to travel with some great company. I then added another two weeks onto the holiday to travel by train through France for ten days prior to catching up with my friends. It meant that I would be away for seven weeks all together, but the thought of this was extremely appealing and exciting.
When I was married to my husband, he and I not always agreed on holiday destinations. He had travelled extensively overseas when he was young and he made no secret of the fact that Europe didn’t really interest him anymore. He enjoyed cruises, caravan trips in Australia and some Asian travel destinations, so we focused mainly on these types of holidays.
My desire was always to see more of Europe, travel to Africa, South America and maybe do some hiking holidays. My current bucket list looks something like this:
When women of a certain age find themselves suddenly single it can be a very liberating occurrence. For some, it is the first time in numerous years that they’ve been able to make decisions autonomously about what they want to do and where they want to go. But it can also be extremely daunting to think that they are all alone and don’t have a travel partner anymore.
In my case, I was always the instigator and organiser of most of our holidays as a married couple. I was the one that came up with holiday ideas and then went about booking them. So it was fairly easy for me to plan a solo holiday.
I have discovered during my travels that many women travel with a girlfriend or join a group tour with other like-minded women. If this makes you feel more secure and comfortable about solo travel then there are plenty of travel companies that conduct group tours all over the world.
I believe that women in their fifties and sixties are now considered as being extremely confident and capable of travelling solo. We are a force to be reckoned with and we are no longer going to be complacent to stay home knitting or going to Bingo once a week!
At the end of the day I think I suffer horribly from Notripophobia – the fear of not travelling or living a life without travel. What are your thoughts?
Annette
March 27, 2024I’m with you, Kathy, about notripophobia. I can’t imagine a life without travelling!
Having lived in Zimbabwe, Vic Falls is a fabulous place to visit, along with Hwange National Park and Bulawayo. There are other places I’d also recommend, but it depends on how long you are visiting.
Kathy
March 28, 2024Me either Annette. I am following your travels throughout our beautiful country at the moment and having serious FOMO.
I had forgotten you’ve lived in Zimbabwe. I will have to pick your brain once I work out where and when I’m travelling to Africa. It is such a vast continent that I don’t know where to start really.